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Julie Nicole
16 August 2007 @ 08:17 pm
Did some running around after work today and exchanged two of the skirts I bought a few days ago for two new ones...because one was the wrong size and the other one I decided I didn't like at all. I got my new bank card in the mail today, so I get to activate that...which reminds me I have to activate my credit card...oh, and I bought a new Spanish/English dictionary to travel with me at the Half Priced Books store. I have one, obviously, but it's kind of falling apart. I think I might be able to use duct tape to salvage it, but that's a might. So I bought a new one. I don't like it quite as much as my old on, but it will do.

I was talking to my friend Lynn, who is already studying in Salamanca, and realized just how rusty I am in speaking the language. That made me kind of nervous. But I'm going to do some reading and reading aloud to get my mouth moving again, and hopefully my brain moving in the right direction. I might like...make some flashcards of important words too. Maybe I'm being too much of a dork about this.

But I guess I really don't want to look stupid when I get over there. I mean, I applied for the advanced level, and from the looks of it my future roommate has already been all over europe....and comes from a hispanic background, which I know doesn't necessarily mean anything, but still.

I just hope she likes me.

I don't want to have a roommate that thinks I'm a total dweeb. That would make Spain not so much fun. I'm used to having amazing roommates that are practically extensions of myself. I'm going to miss them.

But I just hope I can speak enough to stay on my feet, and learn enough in my grammar course to get myself into the classes I want. I don't think I take my placement exam until AFTER I take my three week grammar course, so by that time I should be practically fluent, if all goes well.

Fingers crossed.

I'm going to visit my college next week, to say goodbye to professors and friends--because they really are my extended family. Between the English department and the Spanish department...I mean, they're such a big part of the reason I'm going at all. They've been so supportive. My advisor, Dr. Wastvedt, is the chair of the English department, and he emailed me really quick to see if I was still coming up for a visit because he'd "love to have a chat" before I left. Like that's how awesome they are.

Party on Sunday with a crap load of family, then just about two weeks until tak off.

oh my god.

I'm totally freaking nuts.
Julie Nicole
06 August 2007 @ 06:55 pm
I got my housing assignment in the mail today from ISA, and I got the family I requested!


I'm so excited. My roommate's name is Jacqueline (which is a lotta letters) and she's from Maryland. I'll probably email her in the next couple of days, but I already looked her up on facebook, and she seems like a nice girl. So hopefully all works out well.

I also got a t-shirt, and itinerary, a list of all the students in Seville with ISA next year, and some luggage tags. I'm so. Freaking. Excited.

And my money situation is starting to level out, which is GOOD. I think I just might be ok. I probably won't be traveling much, but I'll be in frigging SPAIN for cripes' sake. Who needs to travel when I'm already traveling?

Jackie looks like she's really into art, and music and dancing, which are all good things. Maybe we can be museum bums together. That'd be fun.

Julie Nicole
31 July 2007 @ 12:37 pm

Remember this song? The one that cues in The Holiday when Cameron meets Jude in the pub?

I love this freaking song. A girl choreographed a beautiful dance to it for our Dance Theatre show last year, and I've been in love with it ever since.

But this--this is amazing.

*had to share*
Julie Nicole
29 July 2007 @ 02:49 pm
Hey all

Quick update to say that I'm home. Have to go unpack. And I obviously have a lot of catching up to do. Lots happens in a week.

Finished the book. My sister is finishing it now. Mark brought his girlfriend to camp. Blah. How convenient. Uh...what else happened? I'll post pictures of the book party and my flipping awesome costume. Eventually. My nose is sunburned. Thankfully the rest of me is not. I have one month until Spain. Still have to sort out my banking problems. A friend of mine is in Madrid right now, and she says that no USA ATM cards can be used in Spain at all anymore--convenient for them to tell us. Waiting for a phone call from my financial aid office about loans. Have to call my friend Lauren. My cell phone is currently out of commission. Getting a new plan soon. Have to research those as well. Have posters to finish, research to get a leg up on, and manuscripts to edit for lecture cues. I have a lot on my plate.

I'll probably be posting the link to my travel journal soon. I was going to maybe do it through blogger or something different, since LJ is kind of my hidden sanctuary, but LJ is the system I'm most comfortable with. I'll ask that you don't friend the account, though. Because...I'm paranoid. Most of this journal isn't friends only, and I wouldn't want certain friends stumbling upon it anyway. This journal is for you guys. No one else.

So yeah. Eventually I'll post a link. And hope that it doesn't backfire and no one finds the journal of my alter-ego. *hugs Pix*

I'll be more in detail later. For now, it is time to unpack and unwind.
Julie Nicole
20 July 2007 @ 04:36 pm
hey kids.

Things are a lot better today. Thanks to those (one in particular, you know who you are) who helped me get to sleep last night.

I was still pretty much a mess this morning. My stomach was all messed up. But she called, and I called back, and we chatted, and she acted like nothing had happened. "Yesterday was the worst day of my life," she said, and then she talked about what she was going to do with her dogs today.

Then I had to pretend that I was just as calm. Even though I told her I wasn't.

But that's ok, I'm loads better now, after five hours at the WENDY'S. Woot. I need more monay.

and i realized that my entry two entries ago was like...not finished. I tend to start things in the middle sometimes, and then I forget to go back to the beginning and put in the exposition...yeah, that was one of those times. So sorry for that. But I only just started updating again. So be grateful!


I'm hungry now, and have to go home to finish working on my costume for tonight. Yesterday I was trying really hard to not feel like a complete nerd, but today I'm so excited that it doesn't matter. We're probably going to be out until 5:00 in the morning trying to get a book, because they started giving numbers out at like...8:00 this morning, and we're not getting there until like....twelve hours after that. but I DON'T CARE!

I'm going to be in the same room with them for a while, and whenever I get one, I get one.

oh my gosh, guys. This is it. The end of the end.

I don't know what I'm going to do at work tomorrow. I'm going to be a damn zombie. and I'm going to be so distracted, because all I want to do is read.



Oh, and then I'm going on vacation on Sunday, so TALK TO YOU ALL IN A WEEK!


Julie Nicole
18 July 2007 @ 09:49 pm
So I guess I should update this. Because I suddenly have a whole lot to say, and the person I want to say it to is sleeping off her jet lag.

My friend came home from Japan today. I went to the airport with her family to meet her

They don't know the half of it.

I do. I know what went on, what she's missing, what she's leaving behind. And I only wish I could understand more than I do. Because I know that, despite it all, I hardly even know a quarter of what she's going through. She's leaving behind a country, friends, and a person she loves. And she's coming back to me. Just me. She's learned a lot about herself. And I can't wait to find out what all of that means.

For me, it feels like she never left. For her, it feels like she's been gone a lifetime. And that's frustrating. Even though I can't explain how good it is to be able to hug her, to lay next to her as she cries and tell her that it's going to be ok. Because before I had to do that over a Skype wire. Now I can do it with her right beside me.

She cried, sobbed, for the first time ever in front of me, really. In all the time I've known her, I've never held her as she cried, even though she's done it countless times for me. But I was there tonight. And I'm glad. "I've been saving this for home," she said to me, "so my friends over there wouldn't see me like this."

I knew she would. And that's why I had to be there with her.

I know that it's going to take her a few weeks to adjust. But she'll be ok.

She brought back all this crazy candy for us to try. Including this tuna candy that was, seriously, like cat treats. It was gross. She had never eaten it, but it was quirky, so she bought some for us to try. It...tasted like a cat treat smells. Even her dogs hated it.

She was so dilirously tired. It was really funny, actually. She brought back five cans of her favorite drink from Japan, called Chu-hi, which is a carbonated alcoholic beverage that can be bought in most convenience stores. She promised me some for my 21st birthday. So we drank those on her back deck, and that mixed with her tired just made her hysterical. "I'm getting blasted and going to bed," she had said, after leaving a message on the voicemail box of a friend of ours that left us laughing for five minutes. That was before she had let herself cry.

I layed with her until she fell asleep, then her dad drove me home in their convertable beetle. It was the first time we've ever really had one on one time. I've never really fit with her family, and she's never really fit with mine. We're polar opposites, and yet we get along. No one has ever understood. But now I'm starting to feel accepted by her family. I gave her brother a hug today when I showed up, and to my surprise he wasn't awkward at all--he hugged me back. And her dad called me Jules and her mom offered to lend my family their webcam for while I'm in Spain. I'm feeling accepted, and relaxed. And it's nice.

As for Spain, I really haven't had much time to prepare. Well, mostly because I've been

1) working
2) Roleplaying
3) cleaning (a procrastination tactic that I like to keep up until 1:00am)
4) driving people places

I'm really scared that I'm not going to have enough money. I'm saving as much as I can, but I'm still paying off my $1444 plane ticket (no, that number is not an exaggeration) and once it's paid off, I'm going to be poor. I don't know how much extra traveling I'm going to be able to do while I'm over there. Hopefully I'll be able to do some. I want to go to Morocco when they offer it, and ride camels. And I still really relalllly want to go to England and visit my English professor and friends there (and Jai as well). But only time will tell if I will have the sufficient funds.

I seriously don't know where the time has gone. I'm going on vacation next week (Maaaark will be there. If you know what I'm talking about) which will be fun, and Lauren is going the week after that. We're finally together again and we're splitting ourselves apart. Isn't that always the way. She invited me to go with them on vacation, but I just can't go, as much as I want to. I have to work. I can't leave for two weeks and expect to be any closer to my money goal. So I guess I'm missing out on another year at the beach with the puppies. *sigh* Oh well. Wendy's gives me money.

I need to be painting. And packing. I took today and tomorrow off work, incase we decided to go to the Nickel Creek concert in Cleveland, but I made the executive decision that it was not a good idea. Lauren called me before she left Japan, all "I can't make decisions for myself right now--make one for me." I had already known she was going to be a mess when she came home. So I just called it off. And I'm glad. It was a nice evening. And I think it will be easier for her to adjust.

I dunno. I got new glasses. They're fun. I wanted to do a video post a long time ago, but I can't find my web cam. Which is making me pissed. When I find it, I'll make a video post, and show you guys my glasses and my haircut and my room. I'm too lazy to take pictures.

I'm gonna go now, cause I'm chatting with you all and I'm tired.

K bye!
Julie Nicole
25 May 2007 @ 09:15 pm
Hey, kids.

I haven't been doing a very good job at the upkeep of this journal. Actually, I've been doing a downright terrible job. But it hasn't been for lack of having things to do.

Actually, I've just been trying to keep my stress level below the "hyperventilating into a paperbag" point.

Which, I guess, is why I'm typing right now. Because typing always calms me down. Well, unless it's for a paper. I should say that mindless typing calms me down. Not that this is mindless typing...whatever.

Wow. Speaking of which, I can't even really type right now because I'm so out of practice. Pain.

I guess I'll break things down into categories, so as to make it easier for you to keep up.

Prepare yourself for Julie's Life, Untamed and Unchallenged. Feel free to bring popcorn.Collapse )

Peace kids. Hope life is treating you well.
Julie Nicole
Tonight, I cried.

I've been wondering for days, for weeks, when it was going to hit. I was wondering why I wasn't upset, why I wasn't even realizing that things are coming to an end, that I won't be seeing these people for over half a year, that some of them....will be gone by the time I get back here. That my roommates will be living in a house without me, and my family will be going to choir concerts and my sisters musicals, and watching my baby sister grow.

That i'm going to be all alone, in a place I've never been, with people I don't know, who don't speak my language...

That everyone's trying to be strong for my sake, not let me know how much they're going to miss me, because then I'll never leave, because it will be too hard.

Tonight, I cried.

Home is falling apart. Or branching out. I don't know. I can't tell. I'm being destroyed all at once, getting put back together like a Picasso portrait and told that it's ok--life is supposed to be this way. And I know that it's good and I know that it's necessary. Unavoidable. I can't remain stagnant. I wasn't made to. And neither was anyone else. We carry on. And I know that people are reaching into my scattered, shattered remains and taking pieces to put in their pockets as we go our seperate ways. I've taken pieces of them. They are a part of my new portrait. That one that Picasso insists is never finished.

But just when it feels like I'm whole, a new piece arrives. And I have to be destroyed again. Just one more time. Just one more triangle.

I wonder, sometimes, if it's a mistake. Leaving all this behind. Some people study abroad because they're running from something. America, their families...themselves. I've often wondered if I'm running from something. Or if I'm running at all.

Home is falling apart. These people I have grown to love over three years are going away, and the world suddenly seems a little less blue, a little less green, a little less round. It doesn't make sense. But it's supposed to I'm told. It's supposed to.

"You're getting ready to start on the most amazing journey of your life," she said to me as she cradled me on the chapel floor, trying desperately not to sob in front of everyone. "I know what this is about...shhh it's all right."

It's future, it's present, it's past. It's wanting change and fearing it at the same time. We cannot stand still. But I wish I could.

Do I?

Tonight I cried.

And it won't be the last time.
Julie Nicole
18 March 2007 @ 09:11 pm
I need some input.

My spanish prof is throwing together a crazy last minute trip to NYC this weekend to see these two art exhibits. I really wanted to go, but this is really short notice. We'd be gone thursday night, friday, and saturday.

Problem 1:
My roommate/best friend's 21st birthday is on saturday. Which means friday night at midnight is a big deal. And I wouldn't be here for that. She said earlier that if I really wanted to go, she would be fine, but I know it would make her sad. Birthdays are really important to her.

Problem 2:
Money. It's a little over a hundred dollars, which isn't bad for a couple day trip to NYC. It's not bad at all. But I would have to take that money out of my Spain account. It would be easily replaced, but I don't know...I'm working really hard to save every penny I earn for this trip.

I think I'm just not going to go....even though I really want to go. I have to go to NYC in May as well, to get my travel visa, and that won't be cheap either. My mom might take me for my 21st birthday, which would be really fun.

Maybe the exhibits will still be going on?

Oh, and I already saw one of the exhibits once.

I'm going to check dates on these exhibits. In the mean time...hit me with some advice.

Peace kids.
Julie Nicole
16 March 2007 @ 03:26 pm
I give you the Soundtrack! You all know the rules already. I'm not posting them again.

For Your Listening Pleasure: A SoundtrackCollapse )